'Winning's about playing football and scoring goals...'
(BBC Radio 4)

By James Applebee

'Celtic have extended their lead at the top to a remarkable 15 points. Now to soccer...' - TREVOR WELCH

***Breaking news*** Word on the street is that Kenny Duncan may, or may not, be playing this Saturday against Brussels LTC.

BUFC's Manager, Coach, Player/Coach, Player, Accountant, Administrator, Tactician and Water Boy, Scott Allen, had some tough decisions to make in the week leading up to Saturday's game. Allen, now in his 2nd year in charge for the club, was faced with a dilemma most managers would give their left arm, or, in Heather Mills' case, her right leg, for. Coincidentally, when Scott Allen was asked what strikers would be picked for this crucial game, Mr Allen was as stumped as Heather Mills, and was running round in circles trying to make the right decision. As it turned out, it was Kenny Duncan, along with Gonzo and Dean, who were left to cool down a bench you could cook your breakfast on, leaving the following players to start the match:

On paper, this was a team that should have rivalled the best teams in the ABSSA league. Communism, however, is also brilliant. In theory.

We started brightly enough though and created some very good chances, with Alex, Miguel and Marek all coming close, but it was the opposition who drew first blood. A couple of errors both in midfield and in defence pretty much allowed them to walk the ball into the net to open the scoring. Just minutes after this, one of their players limped off the pitch with what looked like a shoulder injury, but he was not about to go quietly. He kicked the ball into the shelter where the manager stood, creating an almighty racket. I mean really, did this man not know he was playing the British at Tea-time?! Despite this distraction, BUFC battled forward in search of the equaliser, but LTC's keeper was showing some form and pushed out everything that came his way. Against the run of play, LTC got their second goal in very similar circumstances to their first, with BUFC obviously not learning from their earlier mistake. Despite this, BUFC pushed further upfield knowing that eventually they would get a goal, and that's exactly what happened just minutes before half time. A brilliant solo effort from the Spanish Maestro, Alex, got the ball into the bottom of the net just in time for BUFC to walk off for their half time team talk with their heads held high.

What happened next would have been enough to start riots had this match been played at home, in front of BUFC's hardcore fan, Big Al. LTC kicked off the 2nd half, had two 1-2's, the striker shot, and BUFC were 3-1 down before the whistle had even stopped to announce the start of the final 45. Again, BUFC were behind and playing catch up, but did so with much gusto. Allen's inspired substitution at half time quickly paid dividends, with Kenny D heading home a very well struck Miguel corner to make it 3-2. For the next ten minutes, BUFC pushed and pushed for that ever-elusive equaliser, and any gambling man would have bet his house that it would eventually come. Alas, people were passing the ball when they should have shot themselves, (no double entendre intended, but I like to slip one in every now and again) shots were going wide, the keeper was having a very good game, but most importantly BUFC just didn't have that killer finishing they've been so used to over the last few weeks. Just 10 minutes before the end of the match, LTC got their 4th goal from their 4th attempt on goal, and essentially finished the game off.

If winning really is about playing football and scoring goals, then BUFC must have proved the exception to the rule on Saturday. A win for them would not have been an unfair result, but they will just have to focus on next week's game against Coin Du Balai, and hope to get back in amongst the front runners.

Referee: Outstanding, in that he stood out.
MoM: Kenny D. Thoroughly deserved.