Arts-Loi Aarschot squeak out a win over BUFC Ladies

By Ramster

The ladies turned up to Arts-Loi Aarschot's (ALA) ground in fine fettle and hoping to get back to winning ways. But, more than anything else, the Ladies were hoping to win for Baby Caitlin.

To summarise just some of the changing room action...

• Gibbo the Jockey was still smiling
• Amos was full of Welsh smugness
• Caz was enjoying her first post-detox hangover
• Ram was clogging up everyone's arteries with Marks & Spencer Pain au Chocolat Bread & Butter Pudding

Captain Caz won the toss despite her deadleg sleeping injury and, as planned, chose to head up Mount Aarschot in the first half.

BUFC started brightly, moving the ball well. Fabbi and Ana looked dangerous and Hils and Lisa T were making their presence felt in the middle of the park, working hard and putting ALA players under pressure.

ALA began to gain confidence as the half progressed but BUFC defence rarely looked worried. Rach was calm and in control of the centre; Ram was mouthy; Gibbo patrolled the right flank with confidence and Jackie was fighting hard on the left. And if all else failed, Franci was there to sweep up any ALA through balls.

ALA had some shots, forced some corners, but BUFC mopped up the pressure at the bottom of the hill and worked hard to clear the ball and get up past the halfway line as quickly as possible.

Most of BUFC's attacking action was on the left and Ale and Ana looked dangerous when the midfield and defence popped over some long balls. One such long ball fell to Ale who broke the ALA offside trap and was through on goal with defenders hot on her heels. But the ALA goalkeeper came out fast, blocked the angle and managed to get in the way of Ale's shot.

ALA looked most dangerous when a long ball forced confusion in the BUFC defence. Defenders and midfield were unable to clear the ball but bravely blocked several shots. Finally the ball hit the post and bounced back and hit a diving Jackie who was typically throwing everything she could in the way of the ball. Foot, belly, chin....Jackie will use anything to clear the ball to safety!

The ALA number 13 proved that amateur dramatics are alive and well in Aarschot. Diving, screaming, clutching of ankles, she proved that she was a pro in all areas and prompted Gibbo the Jockey to yell, "Stop screaming like a girl".

In the dying minutes of the first half, Lisa T was caught offside and as she stopped to track back her ankle buckled on the terrible pitch. Lisa T took a disappointing and painful early exit from the game.

This caught everyone by surprise, but none more so than Welsh Amos from the land of Wales who was still in full kit on the sideline, no doubt still yapping on about beating England. Displaying the speed of a Valleys girl on three alcopops, she stripped off and legged it on to the pitch with her Celtic hair, laces, shirt and shorts flying......at which point the ref blew for half time. 0-0 but an exciting first half.

BUFC ladies came out for the second half full of determination. Lisa T's injury had forced a change of structure, Ram moved to midfield, Gibbo to centre back and Amos (she is Welsh you know) to right back.

BUFC got an early reward for all their efforts in the first half. Amos slotted a lovely ball up the right wing to Caz; Caz and Ale constructed some lovely passes around defenders and Ale slotted the ball calmly past the stretching ALA goalkeeper.

But ALA proved that they were not going to let this game go without a fight. They started to put together some good moves up the hill and found an equaliser from a powerful shot on the edge of the area. Franci was at full stretch - there was no stopping that shot.

BUFC came back and put in attack after attack. Ana, Fabbi, Ale and Caz tested defenders but just could not find the second goal.

ALA were more successful however. Another powerful shot, this time from the left side of the area, saw Franci make a fantastic diving save. But she could only block the strike and unfortunately the ball fell to number 13, Aarschot's answer to Meryl Streep, who calmly booted the ball home.

Gutted to be on the back foot, BUFC redoubled their efforts all over the park. Caragh was looking increasingly dangerous on the right and an edgy ALA defence started chopping her down. The first offence took place on the far right of the area. BUFC packed players into the area but just couldn't get the ball in the net. The second foul was just a yard outside the area. Caragh had pushed the ball to the right of the ALA number 10 and was through on goal, but number 10 bodychecked her and sent her flying. The ref should have shown red but his choice of card proved to be yellow. Again, BUFC loaded the penalty area as Caragh went for goal. Her aim was superb but the ball just wouldn't come down and it passed just over the bar.

Number 13/Meryl Streep was to have the last laugh of the match. After a fifty-fifty tackle with Ram, she screamed, rolled and cried, giving the ref a lovely show of her tears. Ram showed her frustration and told her to "F*** off". The ref once again reached for a yellow card and Ram developed acute Tourette's Syndrome and continued to tell the rest of the ALA team to go and fornicate somewhere else.

ALA hung on in the last minutes of the game and as the final whistle blew the BUFC ladies felt totally frustrated to come out of the game with no points and gutted for Lisa T's injury. On the plus side, the team had worked really hard, there was still plenty of bread and butter pudding left, Amos was Welsh and Gibbo was proving to have the stamina of a young Frankie Dettori. Oh yeah.

Man of the Match:
3rd: Hils (BUFC newcoming star)
2nd: Rach, Fabbi (BUFC youth)
1st: Ramster ("experienced" BUFC)

Supporters: Sharonski, Dave the Rave, Middle Al, Fabbi's family, Lisa T's family